


Dishes

by ineedmysickfix



Series: Scottish Safehouse: Polychives Edition [5]
Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Childhood Memories, Childhood Trauma, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Multi, Panic Attacks, S1 Polycule, Set in Episodes 159-160 | Scottish Safehouse Period (The Magnus Archives), bad memories, polychives
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-08
Updated: 2021-01-08
Packaged: 2021-03-11 23:40:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,109
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28625859
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ineedmysickfix/pseuds/ineedmysickfix
Summary: Martin recalls some Past Trauma as Sasha does the washing up.
Relationships: Martin Blackwood/Sasha James/Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist/Tim Stoker
Series: Scottish Safehouse: Polychives Edition [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2049723
Comments: 6
Kudos: 86





	Dishes

**Author's Note:**

> Content Warning (let me know if you need me to add anything else):
> 
> \- past childhood trauma  
> \- emotional abuse from Martin's mom  
> \- flashback to past trauma  
> \- panic attack

Sasha is doing the dishes. It’s Martin’s turn to do the washing up today but she started without telling him. Martin sits on the couch trying to concentrate on his book but his hands were shaking too much because it was _his_ turn to do wash the dishes but Sasha came in from her walk five minutes ago and made a beeline for the sink. _And now she’s doing his washing up._

Pots and pans and silverware clang together and Martin almost drops his book when she puts down a mug just a little too hard. Martin thinks back to Sasha’s mood before she left for her walk, she seemed fine, as happy as they could get while they were essentially stuck out here. Maybe her mood changed while she was out? Or Martin did something and he hasn’t realized.

He takes a breath to calm himself as he thinks of how they interacted throughout the day. They woke up in bed along with Tim and Jon, Tim attempted breakfast and Martin had to help out, then Sasha went for a walk. She didn’t seem to be cross with him or anything. But still… Did she not like the breakfast? Did Martin accidentally add too much salt to the eggs? 

Martin doesn’t realize he’s curled up into a ball on the couch as his mind fills up with what-if scenarios. What if she expected the dishes to be clean when she got home but Martin was too busy lounging around to do them? Maybe she was angry with him for burning her toast this morning when his, Jon’s and Tim’s all turned out fine? Is it possible she could be angry at him for being pulled into the Lonely back then? Or abandoning the archives to work for Peter? He forgot to make tea and she ended up doing that too this morning so maybe…

_”You stupid child! Can’t do anything right!” A pot gets slammed into the sink and his mother scrubs at it harder than necessary. “I give you one task and what are you doing? Lazing about! Honestly, I thought I raised you better!” Spoons and forks are practically thrown back into the drawers as Martin stands in the middle of the kitchen. His hands fiddle with the hem of his shirt as his mother does the washing up. “Get out of my sight you....” She grumbles the rest of her sentence as she turns back to the sink, but Martin still feels the sting as he walks out, as if she was able to hurt him with her arms elbow deep in murky dishwater, “...wretched bastard.”_

“Shit!” A crash and the sound of shattering glass cause Martin to curl up even further in on himself. Martin drops his book in favor of clamping his hands over his mouth, smothering the sob close to leaving his lips. He can practically taste blood from how hard he’s biting his tongue in order to keep quiet. _Oh no, she’s mad and it’s my fault and she’s going to yell and leave and take Tim and Jon and he’ll be all alone again and won’t even have anyone to pull him out of the Lonely this time and-_

Someone’s touching him. He can’t tell who from where his face is buried against his knees and the blood rushing in his ears. But he can feel gentle hands shaking desperately at his shoulders. He tries to breathe and listen as they call to him. “-artin? Martin what’s wrong? Love, what happened?”

Two more voices suddenly join, still groggy from an afternoon of napping and Martin wills himself to actually pay attention. “-’s going on? Is Martin alright?”

“I don’t know. I was doing the washing up and I accidentally dropped a plate then I heard him crying.”

“Martin?” Another hand, this time winding its way through his curls, breaks through his panic. “Sweetheart, do you think you could breathe for me? Just in and out. It’s okay, just breathe.”

Martin lifts his head up to see Tim kneeling in front of him and forces himself to take a breath in but it turns into a sob as he exhales. Another breath in and out, following Tim as he leads him through a breathing exercise, leaves Martin in a calmer headspace. He looks around to see Jon, hair still mussed from sleeping, with a concerned look obvious on his face. Martin lingers on him for a moment hoping to communicate that he’s better with just his eyes, but his gaze shifts to Sasha and he freezes.

“I’m sorry!” He exclaims abruptly, causing the other three to jump. 

Sasha kneels down in front of Martin, careful to make sure she keeps her hands to herself as she looks at him. “Martin, what are you-”

“It was my turn to do the washing up! B-b-but you had to do it even though it was my turn! And you had to make tea this morning and I messed up breakfast and you came home from your walk and the dishes weren’t clean and I’m sorry.”

Sasha stares at Martin for a beat before turning to her partners. She takes a breath and closes her eyes, “Love,” Martin swears he can hear his own heart beating frantically, “I’m not angry with you. And I’m sorry if you thought I was.” She carefully places a hand on his knee and strokes the denim of his trousers with her thumb. “You just looked so invested in you're reading that I thought you'd appreciate me doing the washing up for you. I'm sorry, I'm not cross with you, please know that. If I or any of us do anything that upsets you or makes you think we’re mad, let us know and we can talk about it, okay?”

Martin looks at her with wide eyes, tears threatening to spill over again and suddenly he’s launching himself at Sasha, desperately clinging onto her as he sobs into her shoulder. His cries are muffled against her shoulder but she could still make out whispers ‘thank you’s and ‘I love you’s and she quietly returns the affection.

Tim stands up and joins Jon as they look on at their partners, “You know, I have no idea what happened but I think it’s solved for now. You wanna go back to bed?”

“Yeah, let’s go. We should leave them but we all should probably talk about this later.” Jon replies. The two ascend the stairs back to their bedroom, leaving Sasha and Martin to cuddle and talk out past traumas. And hopefully, this can be the first step to healing old wounds.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey you know the thing where you can tell if someone's angry by the way they do the dishes? ~~No? Just me?~~  
>  This ended up being a stream of angsty consciousness but had to throw in some fluff in there to balance it out.
> 
> If you have any ideas for more (hopefully fluffy) tma polychives cabin au fics, let me know!


End file.
